I want to write the most amazing piece of literature you�ve ever fucking read. I want to write something that will make you, my friends, vomit on yourselves & cry tears of joy at the exact same second. I want it to be perverted, & sadistic but still funny. That probably sounds sick to you, & I love it.
Everything that if you knew about me you�d drop dead shocked
I think too much
-especially about you. (But I wouldn�t call it an obsession)
--because words cannot describe enough.
As I let my nail polish chip off I will occasionally repaint over it (never repairing)
Music was my first true love. * Wink *
-anybody who knows anything about me knows that.
I cry a lot.
-even though you guys might not have guessed it.
I get a bad vibe from mirrors in dark rooms.
I chew at least 10 pieces of gum a day
-& I�m trying to cut back.
I grow attached to people if I find them memorable
-which means I would miss them easily also.
I never bite my nails
-but I do run them across my lips a lot.
When I�m nervous I play with my ears
-usually my left one, & the more nervous I am the harder I tug on it.
I don�t care what other people think of me
-as long as they keep it to themselves.
I still kept all the Barbies I�ve ever owned since I was younger.
I over-think things.
I try to hide my true emotions
-more often from the people I don�t trust.
I fear nothing.
I don�t like talking about the ground
-it makes me concentrate on it & I feel like I�m in one of those zombie movies.
I don�t know the true meaning of the word congregate.
I do not know everything, like other people tend to claim
-nor do I claim I do.
I am your stalker
-well, I was
I hate writing with a blue pen
-even though that�s pretty much all I write with.
I wear my sunglasses at night.
I write about myself a lot
-I�m sure you�ve noticed that by now.
I�m a good ego-booster
-I�ve learned to do that for myself too.
I love making collages
-I create a new one every month if I can.
I mix nail polishes together hoping to get a new colour I can use
-it never really works out.
I get lonely a lot
-I always have, & it seems that being alone more doesn�t help this fact.
I know when people are lying to me.
I was
-a cutter
--a scratcher
---bulimic
----a bully
-----insecure
all in one year.
I am a better person everyday.
I crave a certain amount of caffeine everyday to prevent me from having headaches.
I can tell when someone is trying to hide something from me.
I will get to know you better
-I promise.
Art is my passion, but Music is my life.
When I was younger I hated the Backstreet boys but loved the Spice Girls.
Some people say I�m a very selfish person
-but I like to give too. I would rather call it competitiveness.
At the age of 13, I developed a fear of phones.
I have never crashed a car or been in a car accident & I intend it to stay that way.
When I was little I kept a small bag of a few clothes, toys, & necessities in my closet
-I�m not sure exactly why I did this, I think it was because I was afraid my house would get on fire & if that happened I would lose everything
--If that wasn�t the reason I defiantly had thoughts of running away.
As far as I can remember, I�ve only gotten detention twice, in all my days of school
-I haven�t been expelled or suspended either.
When I am sad, I eat a chocolate, sometimes a cookie
-it always seems to make me feel better too. Instant anti-depressant.
I really hoped I could think of something better than that^ but with the house creaking, walls vibrating, & rain pounding at the windows, this is the best I could do. Bleh. I�m defiantly going back to the old life now�
And it's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile
Since I first saw you
And it's been awhile
Since I could stand on my own two feet again
And it's been awhile
Since I could call you
And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've stretched myself beyond my means
And it's been awhile
Since I can say that I wasn't addicted
And it's been awhile
Since I can say I love myself as well
And it's been awhile
Since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do
And it's been awhile
But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you
And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've gone and fucked things up again
Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away
Just one more peaceful day!
And it's been awhile
Since I could look at myself straight
And it's been awhile
Since I said I'm sorry
And it's been awhile
Since I've seen the way the candle lights your face
And it's been awhile
But I can still remember just the way you taste
And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem to be I know it's me
I cannot blame this on my father
He did the best he could for me
And it's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile
Since I said I'm sorry
Staind-It�s Been Awhile