This is what too much pride can do to a person
2005-02-14 @ 10:25 p.m.

I do not wish to go into this phase I see heading towards me. I can only dream that it will pass, so that things can continue on the way they're supposed to. Just when I thought everything was fixed. It's always me that sidesteps because not for one second can I be a sheep.
I'm coming to realize that the vision of myself I have in my mind-is incorrect in reality. She isn't real and I cannot make her me. I am:not what I thought I wasis so. I am born to be something I am not. Confusing? I can't exactly follow where this is going either. All I see is a quick, abrupt end. Because I'm borderline suicidal again.
They say they "can't bare to lose me." Well look at where they are now. My preparation is needing nobody. I live through the insecurities and fear nothing. I stand for myself and nothing else anymore. I am chaos, disaster, anarcy-misery. and that is.
Hatred is one deadly weapon.

previous - next