i want my life
2004-11-06 @ 2:16 p.m.

I hate this factor. How moody and different I've been acting all because of what he said to her, and how he lied to me about it. And how he sugarcoats everything for me. I'm not naturally this easy to anger. And all this coming into account bothers me. It's been building up for six days now, and I'm tired of suffering.
I'm tired of having those dreams of my attempted suicide. I'm tired of remembering how I felt when I said things. I'm sick of that feeling I get when I cry at night. And I never want it again. I feel way too many emotions for this to become numb afterwards. I want to let go, and give him his second chance. I want him to talk to me. I'm not secluding myself. And it's really not all about me anymore. It's about us. And he makes me feel bad for not communicating with him when I'm only a phone call away. I don't understand, yet I do.
I hate these vibes I'm getting. I'm sick of the same old people. My life is changing all around me and I only hope that I can keep up.
Yes I taste it-Yes I breathe it-Yes I hate it-Yes I feel strain from...(our separation?)But-This is my life-THIS IS MY LIFE--My Cleansation

i want my mother fucking life back

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